Hay Fever and Heels

Spring has sprung in the big Crabby-Apple. Early signs of its arrival are, in no particular order:

-Sudden torrential rain storms (that usually shut down the subways)
-Fun, funky galoshes
-Beautiful blooming trees
-Airborne pollen
-Sexy strappy sandals

One rite of passage some New York women subscribe to is the self inflicted torture of wearing highly uncomfortable shoes as often as possible. Spring and summer provide the enhanced opportunity to add sweat and city soil (read: "Soylent Grey") to the already laborious task of teetering in spikes, wedges and platforms over pot holes and cobble stone streets. Some cultures encourage their women to wear a burka, and some women wear wigs in public to show their modesty and devotion to their god. Many women in our culture perform a modernized foot-binding ritual known as the spike, pointy-toed heel.

I am one such woman. Why, you the reasonable reader, may ask?

Well, there’s the impractical answer:
“They make my legs look longer”

The obvious;
“They make me taller”

The unlikely;
“I like pain”

The unreasonable;
“I’m going out later”

The pathetic;
“Men notice me”

And the absurd;
“I want to be Carrie Bradshaw”

And I suppose all of the above are partly true. But mostly, I just like cute things, and sometimes cute things cause pain (anyone give birth lately? I haven’t - but it sure looks like it hurts, and babies sure are cute!)

One thing the seasoned, sassy and savvy New Yorker learns over time is to know when to start getting pedicures in preparation for the pleasure and pain of the summer sandal. I smugly chuckle to myself when I see a woman wearing sandals in March - obviously a recent purchase that she doesn't have the patience to forgo until warmer weather, even though her toes are turning slightly blue from the chill. The rule of thumb in my house is “it’s not spring until after tax day.” And even then, sometimes it snows in April. So if you get your winter protective layer removed from your footsies too soon, you’ll be wasting your money and hiding their glory for a few more weeks if not months.

I think today was the official land mark day. I can just feel it. I have bared-legs (a skirt, no tights, and I shaved!) and I’m not even cold. There have been a few other days this month that were warm enough, but only now do I think we’re in the clear, ladies.

Though I was wearing my adorable green cowboy boot galoshes yesterday, tromping confidently through 3 foot deep puddles - today, I’m kicking it spring style. But my pedicure is pathetically peeling, so until I can make it to my neighborhood nail salon, these piggies are only going to market under wraps. Wedge platform wraps, that is.